I’ve heard it all a million times – with light there is darkness and the rest of those wonderful statements that talk about sunshine and shade…

But today, I’m sitting here thinking that no one ever told me how hope and despair go hand in hand. Yes, with hope comes despair (or with despair comes hope, if you’re in an optimistic mood).

I like stability to be at a distance from my life but I like it nonetheless. I like knowing that the people I love back home are going to be there no matter what. I don’t know if any of the friends I’ve made here are going to stick around or if they are going to just be friends in passing.
I have nothing against people who come and go because that’s what humans do, but I like a sense of stability and security and today I feel like someone took my rock away.

One of the few people I knew I could count on just let me fall and wasn’t there to catch me. In fact, he pushed me… and now there’s no one to catch me… I’m alone, on my own and everyone who could possibly grab my arm and pull me out of this abyss is way too far away.

I despair and yet I hope that a stranger would come and save me from myself…